Just follow these easy steps:
1. Have your first baby at 40.
2. Start trying for #2 and panic when it doesn’t happen right away.
3. Assume fertility treatments are your only hope. Start with IUI and quickly gateway to the hard stuff – IVF.
4. Try IVF again.
5. And then one more time before you realize your body hates it.
6. Try acupuncture.
7. Work through anxiety by blogging and become poster-mom for secondary infertility.
8.Try to find peace with having an only child.
9. Give away all the baby stuff.
10. Have a series of minor medical maladies (throat surgery, pneumonia, herniated discs) that put you out of babymaking commission for a ridiculous amount of time while your clock threatens to run out.
11. Plan your wedding and finally lose the baby weight from three years ago.
12. Get a job documenting your trying-to-conceive efforts, no pressure or anything.
13. See an energy healer, who makes you give up ice cream.
14. Marry your baby daddy. Take one month off from trying to conceive, paying no attention to the calendar.
15. Drink champagne for seven nights straight during your rehearsal dinner, wedding and honeymoon. Soak in a hot tub each day.
16. Discover surprise pregnancy, apparently undisturbed by cocktails and hot tubs.
17. Stealthily write about surprise pregnancy while not actually telling anyone.
18. Turn 44. Google celebrities who had babies at 44, and feel especially close to Gwen Stefani and Mira Sorvino.
19. Have a hard time believing there’s really a growing baby in there, despite multiple ultrasounds and intense pregnancy symptoms.
20. Try to convince your 3yo that mommy is throwing up because she ate too much cotton candy, hoping she’ll stop asking for it at the Pier.
21. Take the new MaterniT21 blood test and get the all-clear to start telling people about the baby, even though you’re still totally paranoid.
22. Have trouble shaking the feeling that you’re going to wake up in a mental hospital having imagined the whole thing.
23. Tell yourself to never give up, never surrender, which may be from Galaxy Quest, but nonetheless became your weirdo fertility mantra.
I’m pregnant. Thank you from the bottom of my uterus for hanging with me on this crazy journey. More to come.
what wonderfully fabulous news- congrats Amy!
Thank you! We are excited.
OH MY GOSH!!!! Congratulations! So happy for you all!!! WoooooHooooo!!!!
Thanks! I think I’m as excited to announce it on my blog as I was to tell our parents 🙂
Awesome! Congratulations! So happy for you, Dave & Viv!
Thanks Dana!
Congratulations!!! I got goose bumps just reading through and waiting for the final final confirmation. Experiencing secondary infertility (again) and am holding out for hope 🙂
Thanks and baby dust to you, mama!
What awesome news to start the day with. I’ve been following your journey for the last couple of years. So happy for you.
Thank you so much. Means a lot to me.
Wow! Congrats! I had my first at 43 and I have been rooting for you!
That’s awesome!
Aww, congratulations!! This post gives me lots of hope–I’m 35 and haven’t even started… and I’m nervous about a trip to the gyno to tell me ebay my “options” are some apparently at this age I’m consideres advanced. The hell?
Anyway good to know re: ice cream and hot tubs 🙂
Omg, god invented spellcheck for a reason, sorry about that. EBay = what and that should be “since apparently.” Oy.
LOL…methinks you’re in the mood for some online shopping 🙂 Anyway, at 35 you’re a baby! It’s smart to check in with the gyno though – I learned so much going through this I feel like I should get an honorary medical degree.
Congratulations lady this is great news. I was hoping this would happen for you again I hope you have an easy pregnancy and I hope that your baby is happy and healthy and you have an easy delivery.
!!!!! I’ve been waiting to read this post for a year! So, so, so very excited for you and your family, Amy. You very much deserve this happiness. 🙂
Thank you so much for all the support. It’s an exciting time!
Congratulations!! How exciting. I found your blog around the time when I was starting IVF and have been popping by ever since (now 30 weeks pregnant with our first baby!). It can be so comforting to read other people’s stories.
Best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy!
Congrats to you too – that’s amazing. I agree wholeheartedly about the value in sharing stories – it’s why I decided to be such an open book while we were trying. And I love to hear about others’ successes – yay.
Congratulations! Been following your blog for a year or two and am excited to learn of your bun in the oven. I’m 42 but with two under two. And my fiancé and I have been engaged a while but we’re too tired to plan a wedding- so I am so glad you checked that off your list. You inspire me.
Thank you! I’m really glad we waited until we were ready for the wedding. At 3 1/2 my daughter was old enough to be a flower girl and maybe even remember attending. Any younger and I feel like it would have been so hard. I was also way too tired to plan! I say take your time, but whenever you do it, it will be awesome.
I’ve been reading your blog for just over a year now, and we conceived while planning our “big dream wedding”. I’m currently 38 weeks and 3 days, and always checking back to see any updates. This post made me cry, I don’t even know you but am so happy for you and your family! CONGRATULATIONS!
Thanks so much, Angela and congratulations to you! I really appreciate all the support.
Thank you, thank you, thank you! Just had my first unsuccessful IUI at 40 after trying for #2 for a year. I’m gonna follow your lead and stop acting like I’m pregnant before I am. Worked with #1. Thank you for sharing your journey.
You are very welcome – happy you found my blog. Sharing our stories helps so much. I wish you all the luck. Try not to panic like I did!
I just found your Web site after a search for “secondary infertility” online. Your posts give me hope. I am 37 and we’ve been trying for 13 months without success for a second.
I hope that all goes smoothly with the second baby’s arrival!
I have to tell you, 37 sounds SO YOUNG to me! You should definitely have hope. I think it’s good to get checked out by a doctor to make sure everything is okay, but you don’t necessarily have to rush into fertility medicine like I did. Sometimes conception just takes its own sweet time. For me, I really liked using an ovulation monitor so at least I knew we were doing it on the right days and giving ourselves the best chance. GOOD LUCK!!
Amy–thanks for your very sweet comment. I visited an RE six months ago, but we haven’t felt comfortable using medical interventions yet. I think our next step is a SA and maybe a HSG. Hopefully our lucky month is coming soon.
Again, so happy for your story!
Hi Amy,
I’ve been reading your blog but I realized that I never came back to update you. We conceived on our 15th cycle trying (17th cycle altogether). It was our Hail Mary cycle before trying Femara + IUI. I’m at 32 weeks and everything has gone smoothly. (I’m due April 16.) We are so thankful but nervous about taking care of a 3-year-old and a newborn. I’ll be reading your posts for more of your expertise!
I loved your recent post on the drawbacks of sharing a room. Your girls are so beautiful, and I’m happy for you.
Congratulations Amanda! That’s the best news ever. Hope you have an easy birth. Having 2 is crazy but totally worth it. Keep me posted xo